Hell in a Cell (2012) Predictions from jjames

Hell in a Cell (2012) Predictions from http://www.fourdown.org/WWE_Hell_in_a_Cell_2012
http://www.fourdown.org/users/jjames
Night of Champions: #334 (Site) -- #2 (League: Lawrence League)

Hey, look, I'm writing a blog about my predictions for HiaC. None or you are going to read it and probably haven't figured out how to check the posts on here anyway, so here I go.

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*** Hell in a Cell Match, for the WWE Championship
Ryback vs. CM Punk (c)

Let me start by saying that I'm excited for this match. Well, I should probably rephrase that; I'm not as excited about the actual match itself as I am the outcome. I still don't know how the finish sequence is going to go down but it should be something interesting and hopefully a bit different than the normal endings that we see. Obviously I don't see Ryback walking out with the title. He's still way too unproven in his ability to have entertaining matches that last more than 5 min or require more than incessant offense from his side. We very well may see the unintentional end of his monster push here if he ends up getting beyond winded less than halfway through their allotted time. Since this'll be the headliner I would assume they're getting ~20 minutes minimum. Normally I would put a HiaC timeframe closer to 30, but it's goddamn Ryback. If you let Punk keep him at bay that long it would be a detriment to Ryback's gimmick and show that he's only said unstoppable monster when facing off against jobbers and midcarders. Not that I would mind that revelation really, but I feel like it would not be a great idea for his character. Also, I just really don't think he can last that long. Now, HiaC is a great way to protect him against his own weaknesses and make him look like a beast at the same time. The match pacing is normally far slower than your typical main event and far more segmented. That should give him enough of a chance to alternate between tossing Punk around and slowly stalking about the cage while regaining his breath. Punk can use the structure in his favour and integrate it in his offense against the hungry hungry Ryback. Sorry, that sounded better before I typed it out.

That being said, I can't picture any world where Punk dropping the title at a throw-away PPV is even a remote possibility. His feud with Cena is far from over and a loss here would not only beyond cement Ryback as Goldberg 2.0 but also indicate that he's better than Cena. There can't be a single writer backstage that could think this would fly with anyone. If Cena isn't the guy that takes the belt from Punk, it'll be The Rock at Royal Rumble. Thus, I'm fairly confident that there's going to be some kind of interference leading to a wonky finish that allows Punk to look like an overconfident dick and lets them end Ryback's push without him being tossed to the gutter due to the end of his undefeated streak. In an ideal world that interference would come from Big Show after his loss to Sheamus. Maybe they align him with Heyman as well; that promo on SD! seemed to echo the whole 'lack of respect' spiel that Punk and Heyman have been on recently. I think that duo is just about due to turn into a mini stable. More on all of that, as well as my reasoning, in the following section

My Prediction: CM Punk, Pinfall, Yes - interference
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*** Match for the World Heavyweight Championship
Big Show vs. Sheamus (c)

I don't give a shit about either person in this match and it isn't even in a cell. I mean, really, guys? This was the best you could come up with? Oh well. Apparently they want Sheamus to be someone impressive despite the fact that he still doesn't get much of a crowd reaction and the Brogue Kick is being pushed way too hard. Even Stone Cold said that he doesn't think they should have given the Irishman the title yet, let alone keep it on him this long. I'd link you to if but 1) You're not reading this and 2) None of you check twitter. I suppose, though, for the sake of this entry I need to at least feign some interest in this match which I'm basically considering as setup to the new batch of storylines.

So let's get this going. This match is going to plod its way along and bore us all to tears until the fat guy gets kicked in the face. Sheamus pins him and celebrates like he always does. Now we begin baselessly positing ideas with little basis in reality, but in which I have enough confidence to risk my points this month. As Sheamus is walking around screaming and beating his chest like a caricature of the Celts performed by the Romans in the year 45 AD, Show regains his composure. The...I ran out of monikers for Sheamus...turns around in time to catch a WMD to the face/jaw/ear/a few inches away but he sells it anyway and Show lumbers his way to the back. While the albino ginger is staring at the ceiling Ziggler's music hits. He runs down to cash in the briefcase and actually gains the title.

The two main events then manage to set up three separate feuds for Survivor Series and beyond:
1) Punk v Cena (Part 5000, but this still isn't over)
2) Ziggler V Sheamus (only was a mini-feud last time)
3) Show V Ryback (demolishing Show would give him some needed 'legitimacy' instead of stupid momentum)

I told you this was less of a match than a way to further story lines and fully believe it.

My Prediction: Sheamus, Pinfall, No - no interference
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*** Match for the Unified Tag Team Championship
Cody Rhodes & Damien Sandow vs. Kane (c) & Daniel Bryan (c)

I don't think Hell No (I'll never forgive Kyle for that name) are dropping the belts quite yet. They may lose them as soon as SS, but not right now. Regardless of that, this sound be a pretty good match. All four of them work decently enough together and Cody/Bryan have some really nice chemistry. I don't have much to say about this other than the fact that, were this match to take place next month, I'd be reversing the results. I expect that's exactly what I'll be doing around Thanksgiving anyway. This isn't Rhodes Scholars' night, but it's coming quickly. This feud is only in its infancy, so I'm going to watch this play out for another month or two and enjoy watching it fold out.

My Prediction: Kane & Daniel Bryan, Pinfall, No - no interference
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*** Randy Orton vs. Alberto Del Rio

I'm less interested in this than the Diva's match. I like Del Rio but he's recently become the designated jobber to the 'stars' and Orton is Friday Night Cena, so the outcome seems to be telegraphed from the moment the announcement was made. Orton just filmed a movie (prepare for the trailers) and Del Rio is coming off of what seemed to be an endless feud with Sheamus that didn't help either of them in the least bit. I swear that match took place a minimum of six times and I can't remember anything other than someone getting hit with a shoe once.

Del Rio does things that I like, Orton is a snake, Ricardo Rodriguez jumps around and yells... RKO. This'll be a smoke break for me.

My Prediction: Randy Orton, Pinfall, Yes - interference
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*** Match for the Intercontinental Championship
The Miz vs. Kofi Kingston (c)

These two work fairly well together. I don't at all agree with putting the title on Kingston this early in their program, let alone the night after botching a move so badly that The Miz needed stitches in his face, but Miz wasn't doing anything with that title anyway. It hasn't meant a damn thing since Rhodes lost it earlier this year. May as well move it over to Kofi, who also does not mean and is not doing a damn thing. His team with R-Truth ended for no real reason right as the tag division was heating up and I still don't understand what happened there. But the company does need more faces and Kofi is one of the few that aren't treated as comeday acts, so I welcome the potential character development and inevitable soul-crushing disappointment when that fails to come through.

I just noticed that I had very little to say about The Miz here and now feel like that in of itself says everything needed. Kofi's keeping the belt and these two probably carry on to SS, likely falling on opposite sides of the traditional 5/7 vs 5/7 match.

My Prediction: Kofi Kingston, Pinfall, No - no interference
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*** Match for the Diva's Championship
Kaitlyn vs. Layla vs. Eve Torres (c)

1) Layla seems to has potential, but if she hasn't reached it by now then she never will.
2) Kaitlyn doesn't have a character and I haven't seen much of her in the ring. She wasn't supposed to win that battle royale in the first place.
3) Eve Torres

I reverse my decision on Orton/Del Rio earlier. I got more excited for that match just trying to figure out what I was going to type for the Divas.

My Prediction: Eve Torres, Pinfall, No - no interference
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*** Will the World Heavyweight Championship MITB Briefcase get cashed in during the PPV?

It's time for Ziggler. I really think so. I'm less convinced than I was prior to Wednesday Night Whatever-The-Fuck, but I still think this will be the right place for him to cash in and swap the title.

My Prediction: Yes, and the title will change hands
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*** Will Brock Lesnar make a live appearance during the PPV?

I know some people are pulling for this, but none of the possible outcomes of this occurring seem pleasant and I doubt they'd waste one of his dates on a run-in.

My Prediction: No
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*** WWE Tag Team Championship Match: Who will be pinned or submitted?

Sorry, Cody; Sandow looks to have more immediate momentum behind him and it hurts you less to take the L.

My Prediction: Cody Rhodes
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*** WWE Tag Team Championship Match: Who will score the pinfall or submission victory?

Kane won his match on SD!, Bryan lost his own. I see Bryan taking the pin when it's time for them to drop the titles, but I'm pretty sure it's his turn to pick up the win for the team.

My Prediction: Daniel Bryan
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*** Diva's Championship Match: Who will be pinned or submitted?

Why am I typing anything at all here? What have I done? Kaitlyn shouldn't be in this match in the first place and I hate typing her name.

My Prediction: Kaitlyn
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*** How many title changes will occur at Hell in a Cell?
-- 4-Down Note: "This includes title changes for ANY match that is aired on TV/online (such as during a pre-show), regardless of whether or not the match was announced ahead of time or presented as a match above in the game. Dark matches will not count. If one title changes hands multiple times in one show, each time it changes counts as a title change."

Unless they have Cesaro/Gabriel on the pre-show and want to start my night in the worst way possible, I really only see the World Title changing hands. That's not even in an announced match, either. Man, do I use a large amount of commas.

My Prediction: 1
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So, there we go. I'm not sure that I'll ever take the time to do this again (unless the card is much better or there's more interest) but it was fun enough for a potentially one-off try.